Or, what should I be scared of today?
Condition red: the U.S. Army is warning us that our beloved Twitter could be used by terrorists to thwart and attack our bourgeois capitalist system by passing 140 character messages in cyber-space. Want to read the official report?
Thank you U.S. Army for keeping ahead of the curve for potential things I should worry about. Trying to ramp up a little worry before that pesky election? Wouldn’t it just be easier if the military ran everything? But, I digress
I like the line in the story that refers to the types of people using Twitter, including VEGETARIANS! Good God! Where is my rifle? Kids, get to the bunker. Where is my one year supply of crackers? MARTHA, HIDE THE MEAT! THE VEGETARIANS ARE USING TWITTER. Oh yeah, and so are the terrorists, apparently.
Those clever bastards. Nothing gets by them. The terrorists too.
I would be willing to bet that the terrorists probably gave up on Twitter a while back when it was pretty unreliable. Can you imagine trying to plan a terrorist attack and you get the fail whale? Can you imagine what a loser terrorist you’d feel like? All your terrorist friends would be saying “why did you tell us to use Twitter? We went with it but Plurk was way better, but no, you had to use Twitter.” And so, there’d be a few dozen less virgins in heaven for that guy.
Twitter is better now, but I think I’m fearful. I think I am. Am I? I’ll have to sit in a corner and try shuddering for a while. Maybe screaming uncontrollably? Would that help?
Is it really a surprise that terrorists might use current or emerging communications tools and that we ought to monitor them? Duh. It’s a good thing there’s somebody out there thinking about this stuff, and next time an Al-Qaeda operative adds me on Twitter, I’ll be sure to report him.
What I wonder is what the U.S. Army and “intelligence community” plan to do to stop them from using these modern communications tools? Shut down the Internet? Wait. They’re already planning on stomping on our freedoms that way. Silly me.
Maybe it’s a good thing that the terrorists are using Twitter to communicate, unless they’re protecting their tweets, in which case maybe the U.S. Army should strong-arm Twitter to unprotect all tweets, but just for them. That would be interesting.
The further we get from 9/11, the less this kind of fear mongering tends to work on the easily fear mongered. We should be vigilant, but we shouldn’t be screaming in the streets, unless you feel like doing that. But please, don’t do it too early in the morning. I’m trying to sleep.
The real story: Cold War II
If my daughter were to date someone like this, I'd disown her.
I guess with the prospect of Barack Obama possibly winning the U.S. election and eventually pulling out of Iraq, the U.S. military industrial complex is looking for new targets. Enter, China.
In checking out that story on Twitter and the U.S. Army, I was alerted to this possibility on the Federation of American Scientists website. They’re talking about starting a cold war with China. The Federation of American Scientists runs a story on a cold war with China? Shouldn’t these guys be checking on some beakers or animals in cages instead of this? Anyway.
Anybody who knows me will know what I have to say about China, Russia and those topics. Yes, we do have to watch what they’re up to. But, if you want to stop the Chinese in their tracks, maybe the U.S. government should shut down Wal-Mart. I think the Chinese economy would grind to a halt.
I got a chuckle out of the guy who’s kind of in charge of this whole thing: Paul Wolfowitz. Yes, that Paul Wolfowitz. The guy who “planned” the war in Iraq is now advocating for the next cold war. Guess he has lots of military stock that’s plummeted in value lately. Time to pump up the military stock when everything else is in the shitter. Something tells me this guy doesn’t exactly have a gold-plated pedigree when it comes to planning out wars. If he’s planning anything cold, maybe it should be cracking open a beer and just relaxing.
It makes you shake your head sometimes because these people just don’t get it. They never will.
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